You‘re Undead. Now What?
By Melanie Karsak
You were bit by a zombie. That sucks. No, wait, that would be vampires . . . instead, that bites. You were lucky enough not to be eaten alive but not lucky enough to avoid being bitten. Bad luck, friend. Now you have nasty zombie-goo pumping through your veins, and you are about to turn you into a reanimated corpse. What’s a girl to do? In this guide, I offer some suggestion on how to handle your metamorphosis from living to undead both pre-and post-mortem.
In the short few hours before you turn into a zombie. What should you be doing? Here are a few suggestions:
- Pass off all your ammo to your group or leave it where it can be easily found if you are a solitary. Give someone a chance even if you are doomed.
- Pass of any supplies you might be carrying. Don’t give away your canteen, the survivors still probably don’t know how the disease is being spread, but feel free to pass along matches, batteries, walk-talkies, or other useful items.
- Tell everyone you love how much you love them and why. This will motivate them to survive the apocalypse.
- Tell everyone you hate how much you hate them and why. A good catharsis never hurt anyone.
- Reassure your child, lover, sister, or friend that it is perfectly fine for them to blow your brains out. You would do the same for them.
- Try to enjoy a last meal. Pretty soon, you’ll be dining on human flesh. If you can, try to have one slice piece of pizza.
- If you can stomach it, make your peace then check out. Morbid, yes, but don’t make someone you love kill you.
Now, let’s say you have turned zombie without the benefit of being in a group. Now what? Here are a few options you might explore:
- Discover if you are a fast or slow zombie. Try sprinting 28 Days Later style. No luck? Well, odds were against you anyway. Instead, try perfecting the zombie shuffle.
- Go exploring! Haven’t you always wanted to see the inside of your dream house? The girl’s locker room? Somewhere? Now is your chance. Do watch out for the living; they will shoot you dead.
- Turn others into zombies but don’t eat them. This will take self-control, but no one wants to shuffle around without their bff. Imagine how much fun you could have together. Since you won’t be running from the undead, you’ll be free to enjoy your down-time.
- Jump off things. Buildings. Cliffs. From windows. You won’t die, so why not do a little thrill seeking?
Becoming a zombie is unfortunate, but that doesn’t mean you can’t still have fun. Learning to look at the bright side and embrace your zombie uniqueness will really enhance your experience of being one of the living dead. After all, it’s all fun and games until someone ends up undead!
Thanks so much for having me!
The Harvesting Series, Book 1
Genre: Horror/Urban Fantasy
Publisher: Steampunk Press
Number of pages: 394
Word Count: 71000
Cover Artist: Michael Hall Photography
TV interview with book info:
When mankind finally consumes itself, can any spark of humanity survive? Layla fights to keep those she loves alive when the zombie apocalypse unfolds, but she soon learns that zombies are not the only problem. With mankind silenced, those beings living on the fringe seek to reclaim power. Layla must learn who to trust, fast, if she hopes to save what is left of our kind.
About the Author:
Melanie Karsak, steampunk connoisseur, white elephant collector, and caffeine junkie, resides in Florida with her husband and two children. Visit the author at her blog, melaniekarsak.blogspot.com, to learn more about upcoming projects.
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